Understanding and Managing Unconscious Emotional Tensions

In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it's easy to overlook the subtle undercurrents of tension that constantly flow through us. These are not the acute stresses of a looming deadline or an impending difficult conversation but rather a more insidious form of strain that we often don't recognize because they are so woven into the fabric of our daily existence. These tensions are emotional in nature, quietly draining our "body budget," a term that encapsulates our reservoir of physical and mental energy. Understanding and managing unconscious emotional tensions can be transformative, unlocking new levels of mental clarity and creativity.

The Invisible Weight of Everyday Emotions

Every day, we are undergoing tensions, every moment, all day long. These tensions are not the pronounced emotions such as joy, fear, or anger that we readily identify and respond to. Instead, they are subtler, more pervasive, and because they are so common or not as intense, we often do not perceive them consciously. However, just because these emotional tensions are less apparent does not mean they are any less impactful. On the contrary, they are debilitating emotions, sapping our energy and constraining our mental and creative faculties.

The concept of a "body budget," as described in the realm of psychology and wellness, provides a useful framework for understanding this phenomenon. It suggests that our bodies manage a kind of budget of resources, such as energy, attention, and emotional capacity. These subtle, everyday tensions act as withdrawals from our body budget, leaving us with less to invest in activities that require mental effort, creativity, or emotional engagement.

The Environmental Triggers

Interestingly, the sources of these tensions are often found in our immediate surroundings: the objects in our homes, photos, art, and other items that populate our living and working spaces. These items, many of which we choose to surround ourselves with for their aesthetic appeal or sentimental value, can also be sources of emotional tension. They hold memories, some of which may be painful or complicated, and can trigger low-level fears or anxieties. 

The link between our emotions and our environment is profound. The spaces we inhabit are not just physical locations but emotional landscapes. Every piece of art, every photograph, every seemingly benign object has the potential to evoke an emotional response, often one that we are not consciously aware of.

The Practice of Clearing the House

To manage and mitigate the impact of these unconscious emotional tensions, I propose an exercise I call "Clearing the House." This practice involves taking a mindful tour of your living or working space and pausing to examine each photo, piece of art, and significant object. The goal is not to analyze your reaction but to simply become aware of it, to note any physical sensations or emotional responses that arise without expectation or judgment.

The process is akin to a meditative practice, where the focus is on observation and awareness rather than analysis or action. By becoming attentive to our body's reactions to the items in our environment, we might be surprised to notice that tensions rise, regardless of what we were anticipating. The key is to feel these sensations fully until they abate, acknowledging their presence and then letting them go.

The Benefits of Emotional Decluttering

What makes "Clearing the House" so powerful is its potential to bring unconscious emotional tensions into the light, allowing us to address them directly. This practice can lead to a form of emotional decluttering, where we become more conscious of the emotional impact of our environment and can make choices about how to arrange our spaces in ways that support our mental and emotional well-being.

Over time, this practice can lead to a significant reduction in the background noise of emotional tension, freeing up our "body budget" for more productive and fulfilling endeavors. It can enhance our mental clarity, boost our creativity, and improve our overall emotional resilience. By understanding and managing the unseen emotional currents that flow through our daily lives, we can create spaces that nourish rather than deplete us, environments that inspire rather than constrain.

Embracing the Journey and Seeking Emotional Resolution With Cedric Bertelli 

"Clearing the House" is more than just a one-time exercise; it's a continuous practice of becoming more attuned to the subtle interplay between our emotions and our environments. It's about recognizing that our surroundings have a profound impact on our emotional well-being and taking active steps to cultivate spaces that support and enrich us. This journey towards emotional clarity and environmental harmony can transform not just our living spaces but our lives, opening up new possibilities for creativity, connection, and well-being.

If you find yourself in need of additional support and attention when it comes to understanding and managing unconscious emotional tensions, Cedric Bertelli is here with his practice of Emotional Resolution to guide you. Embrace EmRes, and let Cedric Bertelli and this remarkable approach guide you on your path to emotional well-being and impactful change in our challenging yet hopeful world. To start a conversation today, contact us here.

Do Tough Childhoods Make Tough and Resilient Individuals or Wounded Adults?

When we hear stories of individuals overcoming adversities from their childhood to achieve great success, it's easy to be inspired and buy into the narrative that tough upbringings forge tough and resilient individuals. This perspective suggests that challenges and hardships in early life equip people with the strength and perseverance needed to navigate future obstacles. However, this oversimplified view ignores the nuanced reality of how adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) truly affect individuals throughout their lives. Today, we will explore the complex relationship between tough childhoods and adult resilience, challenging the myth of, do tough childhoods make tough resilient individuals or wounded adults? 

The Myth of Universal Resilience

The idea that all individuals who face hardship in their early years emerge as stronger and more resilient adults is a compelling narrative. It feeds into the cultural admiration for self-made success stories and the belief in the transformative power of adversity. However, this notion fails to acknowledge the full spectrum of outcomes for those who endure tough childhoods. While some individuals do develop remarkable resilience, others carry deep emotional wounds that can hinder their well-being and functionality as adults.

Understanding Resilience and Vulnerability

Resilience is often misunderstood as a universal trait that individuals either possess or lack. In reality, resilience is a dynamic and multifaceted quality that can vary greatly among individuals and even within an individual over time. It is influenced by a combination of genetic, environmental, and personal factors. Similarly, vulnerability to the negative impacts of a challenging upbringing is not a sign of weakness but a natural human response to prolonged stress and trauma.

The Role of Support Systems

One of the critical factors that can influence whether a tough childhood leads to resilience or enduring pain is the presence of supportive relationships and environments. Children who face adversity but have access to caring adults, safe spaces, and positive experiences are more likely to develop the tools they need to cope with stress and bounce back from challenges. In contrast, those who lack such support systems are at a greater risk of experiencing lasting negative effects.

The Spectrum of Responses to Adversity

The impact of a challenging upbringing on an individual's adult life can vary widely. Some people emerge with a strong sense of determination and adaptability, while others may struggle with trust issues, emotional regulation, or mental health disorders. It is crucial to recognize that there is no one-size-fits-all response to adversity and that each person's journey is unique.

Debunking the Myth

To truly understand the relationship between tough childhoods and adult resilience, it is essential to move beyond simplistic narratives. Recognizing the complexity of human development and the interplay of various factors that influence our responses to adversity allows for a more compassionate and nuanced perspective. Rather than glorifying tough childhoods as crucibles of strength, it is important to acknowledge the pain and struggle they can cause and to emphasize the importance of support, healing, and growth.

The Importance of Addressing Childhood Adversity

Given the potential long-term impacts of adverse childhood experiences, it is vital for society to invest in prevention and intervention efforts. Providing children with stable, supportive, and nurturing environments can help mitigate the negative effects of early adversity. Additionally, offering accessible mental health services and fostering communities that understand and respond to the needs of those who have experienced childhood trauma can promote healing and resilience.

The Neurological Consequences of Childhood Environments: Insights from Boris Cyrulnik

Boris Cyrulnik, a noted figure in neurology and psychiatry, elucidates the profound impact of childhood environments on brain development. He explains that children raised without affection and safety are neurologically wired to process experiences with heightened sensitivity to distress and anger, due to the predominant engagement of the amygdala. This wiring predisposes them to perceive life through lenses of suffering and cynicism.

In contrast, those nurtured in supportive and joyful settings tend to develop neural pathways that favor the nucleus accumbens, fostering positive emotions and a rewarding perception of life. Cyrulnik's perspective highlights the crucial role of early experiences in shaping our emotional well-being and underscores the importance of providing children with loving, safe, and enriching environments for healthier psychological development. To listen to more on this topic, check out my youtube short here

Emotional Resolution With Cedric Bertelli 

While it is true that some individuals who face tough childhoods develop remarkable resilience, it is equally important to acknowledge those who continue to struggle with the aftermath of their early experiences. The myth of universal resilience oversimplifies the diverse and complex ways in which people respond to adversity. By recognizing the full spectrum of outcomes and the importance of supportive relationships and environments, we can foster a more empathetic and informed approach to addressing the challenges posed by tough childhoods. Ultimately, it is through understanding, support, and compassion that we can help all individuals, regardless of their past, to build a resilient and fulfilling future.


If you find yourself in need of additional support and attention when it comes to troubles you faced in your childhood, Cedric Bertelli is here to help you lift your past trauma with Emotional Resolution. Embrace EmRes, and let Cedric Bertelli and this remarkable approach guide you on your path to emotional well-being and impactful change in our challenging yet hopeful world. To start a conversation today, contact us here.

Understanding Stress vs. Anxiety

Stress and anxiety are two common emotional states that we all experience at some point in our lives. While they may seem similar, they are distinct in their nature and effects on our mental and physical well-being. In this blog post, we will explore the differences as well as understanding stress vs. anxiety, the role of the brain in generating them, and how to manage these emotions effectively with practices like EmRes.

Stress: A Natural Response

Stress is a natural and often necessary response to challenging or unfamiliar situations. It is the brain's way of preparing us to deal with threats or demands. When we encounter a new or unexpected situation, our brain activates a stress response. This response triggers the release of stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol, which prepare our body to take action.

Hyper Awareness, Not Debilitating Fear

Healthy stress is not meant to be a debilitating fear. Instead, it should be experienced as a state of hyper-awareness. Think of the feeling you get when you enter an unknown place, like a new city or a foreign country. Your senses become heightened, and you become more alert to your surroundings. This heightened awareness can help you adapt and respond effectively to the new environment.

The Role of Prediction in Stress

One key aspect of stress is prediction. Stress is generated by the brain when it has no previous model to predict from. In other words, when we encounter a situation we've never experienced before, our brain doesn't have a set of established patterns to rely on. This lack of predictability can trigger the stress response.

For example, if you're about to give a presentation on a topic you've never presented before, your brain may interpret this as a stressful situation because it can't predict how it will go. However, as you gain experience and confidence in public speaking, the stress response tends to diminish because your brain can now predict the outcome with greater accuracy.

Anxiety: Unnecessary Fear

While stress is a natural response to novel or challenging situations, anxiety is a different beast altogether. Anxiety is a state of unnecessary fear and apprehension. It often arises from the anticipation of future events or situations, even if there is no immediate threat.

The brain's role in anxiety is complex. It involves overactive thinking patterns and a heightened sense of danger. Unlike stress, which can be a response to a real and present challenge, anxiety is often fueled by irrational fears and excessive worry about what might happen in the future.

Managing Stress and Anxiety with EmRes

Emotional Resolution (EmRes) is a powerful tool for managing both unhealthy stress and anxiety effectively. EmRes is based on the principle that unresolved emotions and traumatic experiences can contribute to unnecessary stress and anxiety. By resolving these emotions, individuals can experience relief from their symptoms. New situations can often create stress as well as fear. Fears can certainly be resolved with EmRes. When fears are resolved through EmRes, a patient may find that they are left with a healthy and somewhat exhilarating feeling of stress.

EmRes involves a guided process of identifying and releasing stored emotional tension in the body. This can be particularly helpful for individuals who struggle with chronic stress or anxiety, as it addresses the root causes of these emotional states.

Practical Tips for Managing Stress and Anxiety:

1. Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness meditation and breathing exercises can help you stay grounded and reduce the impact of stress and anxiety

2. Exercise Regularly: Physical activity releases endorphins, which are natural mood lifters. Regular exercise can reduce stress and anxiety levels.

3. Seek Support: Talking to an EmRes Practitioner like Cedric Bertelli can provide valuable tools and strategies for managing stress and anxiety.

4. Prioritize Self-Care: Taking care of your physical and emotional needs is essential for managing stress and anxiety. Ensure you get enough sleep, eat well, and engage in activities you enjoy.

Emotional Resolution with Cedric Bertelli 

In summary, understanding stress vs. anxiety and that they are distinct emotional states that have different triggers and effects on our well-being is crucial. Stress is a natural response to challenging situations and can be experienced as a state of hyper-awareness. Anxiety, on the other hand, is unnecessary fear and worry about future events.

Emotional Resolution (EmRes) is a valuable tool for managing both stress and anxiety by addressing unresolved emotions used by professionals like Cedric Bertelli. Additionally, mindfulness, exercise, seeking support and self-care can all be effective strategies for managing these emotions and improving overall mental health.

By understanding stress vs. anxiety and employing these strategies, individuals can lead healthier and more fulfilling lives. Embrace EmRes, and let Cedric Bertelli guide you on a path of emotional well-being by managing your feelings of stress and anxiety. To start a conversation with Cedric today, contact him here

How to Live in This World as an Empath

In today's world, filled with conflicts, environmental challenges, and the relentless exploitation of Earth's resources, living as an empath can be particularly challenging. Empaths, often characterized by their heightened sensitivity to the emotions and energies of others, can easily become overwhelmed by the constant negativity and stress that surrounds them. However, there is hope for empaths to not only survive but thrive in this complex world. One solution lies in resolving our fears with EmRes (Emotional Resolution), a powerful technique that can help empaths maintain their emotional well-being while still being effective agents of change.

The Empath's Dilemma

Empaths possess a unique gift of empathy, allowing them to connect with others on a profound level. They often feel the pain, suffering, and joy of those around them as if it were their own. While this empathy is a beautiful trait, it can also be a double-edged sword, especially in a world filled with conflicts, environmental crises, and social injustices.

Empaths often find themselves absorbing the negative emotions and energies of others, which can lead to emotional exhaustion, anxiety, and even physical ailments. Furthermore, the overwhelming scale of global issues can leave empaths feeling helpless and despondent, wondering how they can possibly make a difference.

The Power of EmRes for Empaths

Here's how EmRes can benefit empaths and help them become effective agents of change:

1. Embracing Emotional Balance: EmRes helps empaths confront and resolve their own fears and emotional triggers. By doing so, they can achieve a state of emotional equilibrium that allows them to respond to external stressors more effectively.

2. Protecting Their Energy: EmRes teaches empaths to establish healthy emotional boundaries, preventing them from becoming overly permeable to the emotions of others. This newfound boundary-setting can shield empaths from emotional exhaustion.

3. Channeling Empathy for Change: Rather than being paralyzed by the pain and suffering in the world, empaths can use their empathetic abilities as a driving force for positive change. EmRes can help them channel their empathy into constructive actions and advocacy.

4. Fostering Resilience: Emotional resilience gained through EmRes allows empaths to bounce back from setbacks and challenges. This resilience is crucial for maintaining their well-being in a world where conflicts and crises are prevalent.

5. Creating Emotional Space: EmRes provides empaths with the tools to release and heal past traumas, freeing up emotional space for personal growth, empathy, and compassion toward themselves and others.

6. Enhancing Empathetic Connections: By addressing their own emotional wounds, empaths can form healthier, more balanced relationships with those they seek to help, fostering more authentic connections and effective communication.

7. Leading by Example: Empaths who have embraced EmRes can serve as powerful examples of emotional healing and resilience, inspiring others to follow suit and create a ripple effect of positive change.

How to Start with EmRes

If you're an empath looking to incorporate EmRes into your life, here are some steps to get started:

1. Learn about EmRes: Research EmRes and consider seeking guidance from a certified EmRes practitioner or therapist like Cedric Bertelli to learn the technique effectively.

2. Self-Reflection: Take time to identify your own fears, emotional triggers, and unresolved issues. Understanding your emotional landscape is the first step toward healing.

3. Practice Mindfulness: Engage in mindfulness and meditation techniques to stay grounded and present, helping you manage overwhelming emotions more effectively.

4. Set Boundaries: Establish clear emotional boundaries with others to protect your energy and prevent emotional overload.

5. Take Action: Use your newfound emotional resilience to engage in actions that promote positive change in the areas that matter most to you, whether it's environmental conservation, social justice, or personal well-being.

Embracing Change and Empowerment

In conclusion, for empaths grappling with the complexities of our world, embracing Emotional Resolution (EmRes) with the guidance of experts like Cedric Bertelli can be a transformative journey. This innovative technique empowers empaths to find emotional balance, set healthy boundaries, and channel their empathetic gifts into becoming effective agents of change. Through EmRes, empaths not only heal themselves but also serve as beacons of resilience and compassion, inspiring a ripple effect of positive transformation in a world in need of empathy and healing. Embrace EmRes, and let Cedric Bertelli and this remarkable approach guide you on your path to emotional well-being and impactful change in our challenging yet hopeful world. To start a conversation today, contact us here.

Subtle Tensions That Shape Our Lives and Relationships

In the intricate tapestry of human existence, there exists a realm of emotions and sensations that often evade clear classification or labeling. These subtle tensions, though less overt than feelings like fear or anxiety, play a significant role. These subtle tensions often shape our lives and relationships without us even knowing. They manifest in various forms, such as a smell, a silhouette, a voice, or an unspoken gesture. These unspoken emotions and sensations are the threads that weave the complexities of human connections and experiences.

The Intrigue of Scent

A whiff of a familiar scent can transport us to the past, evoking emotions that lie just beneath the surface. It might be the fragrance of a childhood home, a loved one's perfume, or the aroma of a favorite dish. These scents carry with them an invisible weight. A tension that tugs at the heartstrings, linking us to memories, places, and people. The unspoken tension of scent can both comfort and disquiet us, revealing the depth of our emotional connections. Consider the subtle tension of anticipation that arises when you smell the first rain after a long drought. There's an unspoken excitement in the air, a promise of renewal and transformation. This tension, although not fear or anxiety, influences our mood and actions. Urging us to step outside and embrace the moment.

The Enigma of Silhouette

Silhouettes have a way of revealing only part of the picture while obscuring the rest. They play with our imagination and provoke curiosity, subtly affecting the way we perceive those around us. The tension in a silhouette lies in the unknown, the questions it raises about what's concealed in the shadows. Think about a moment when you observed a loved one from behind, their silhouette against a setting sun. The outline of their figure may reveal little about their current state of mind or emotions. Yet there's an undeniable tension in that moment. You might wonder what they are thinking, feeling, or whether they are aware of your presence. It's a tension that invites you to approach, to engage, to uncover the unspoken truths within.

The Echo of Voice

The tone and cadence of a person's voice hold a treasure trove of unspoken emotions and tensions. It's not always what someone says, but how they say it that carries profound meaning. A soft-spoken apology may carry more weight than an assertive declaration, revealing a vulnerability that words alone cannot convey. Consider the tension in a hushed whisper during a late-night conversation with a close friend. The lowered voice may signify trust, intimacy, or a shared secret. It's an unspoken understanding that what is said in that moment holds great significance. And the tension in the air heightens the connection between you.

The Language of Unspoken Gestures

Gestures, both subtle and grand, communicate volumes about our feelings and intentions. An affectionate touch, a reassuring smile, or a fleeting glance can convey more than words ever could. These unspoken gestures create a unique language of their own, enriching the tapestry of our relationships. Think about the tension in the silence that follows a heartfelt embrace. No words are needed to express the depth of emotion shared in that moment. It's an unspoken understanding that speaks volumes, reinforcing the bonds of love, friendship, or empathy.

Navigating the Subtle Tensions

Recognizing and navigating these subtle tensions in our lives and relationships requires sensitivity and mindfulness. They may not always be obvious, but their influence is profound. Here are a few ways to embrace and understand these unspoken emotions.

1. Mindful Presence

 Be fully present in your interactions with others. Pay attention to the subtleties in scents, silhouettes, voices, and gestures. This heightened awareness can help you pick up on the unspoken tensions that shape your connections.

2. Open Communication

Encourage open and honest communication in your relationships. While subtle tensions have their place, they should not replace meaningful dialogue. Sometimes, addressing these tensions head-on can lead to deeper understanding and connection.

3. Empathy

Practice empathy by trying to see the world from the perspective of others. This can help you interpret the unspoken tensions they may be experiencing and respond with greater understanding and compassion.

4. Self-Reflection

Take time for self-reflection to better understand your own subtle tensions. What scents, silhouettes, voices, or gestures trigger emotions or memories for you? Exploring your own emotional landscape can enhance your self-awareness and enrich your relationships.

Cedric Bertelli

The subtle tensions that shape our lives and relationships are a testament to the richness and complexity of human experience. They remind us that emotions are not always neatly categorized but exist on a spectrum of feelings and sensations. Embracing these subtleties allows us to delve deeper into our connections with others. To further explore the depth and intricacies of human emotions and relationships, it can be immensely beneficial to engage with emotional resolution. Emotional resolution is a powerful method that helps individuals address and resolve unresolved emotional tensions and traumas, whether obvious or subtle. Emotional Resolution With Cedric Bertelli offers a unique perspective on understanding the subtleties of emotions and how they impact our lives. By acknowledging that emotions exist on a spectrum, emotional resolution helps individuals to identify and address the underlying emotional blocks. Contact Emotional Resolution With Cedric Bertelli today to address the emotions and subtleties that can hinder personal growth and healthy relationships.

Supporting Parents Navigating the Depths of Shame

Parenthood, a journey abundant with love and growth, also harbors shadows that many parents find themselves wrestling with — the silent adversary named shame. A pervasive feeling that can seep into the most vulnerable corners of a parent's heart, casting doubt and self-judgment. In ‘Supporting Parents Navigating the Depths of Shame’, we delve into the ways in which we can collectively foster an environment of support, empathy, and understanding for parents navigating the complex terrain of shame.

Understanding the Roots of Parental Shame:

Parental shame often emerges from the unrealistic expectation of perfection. Societal standards, the curated images on social media, and, at times, our own internal narratives contribute to the notion that flawless parenting is not only achievable but expected. The first step in dismantling the roots of shame is recognizing that no parent is without flaws, and each parenting journey is unique.

Creating a Judgment-Free Zone:

One of the most impactful ways to support parents dealing with shame is to create a judgment-free zone. Whether within friend circles, family gatherings, or online communities, fostering an environment where parents feel safe to share their struggles without fear of condemnation is essential. Judgment-free spaces not only validate the experiences of parents but also encourage open dialogue and the sharing of valuable insights.

Encouraging Vulnerability:

You may find while supporting parents navigating the depths of shame that shame often thrives in secrecy. Encouraging vulnerability within parenting communities can be transformative. When parents share their challenges and triumphs, they break down the walls of isolation that shame builds. This openness not only reassures parents that they are not alone in their struggles but also serves as a reminder that vulnerability is not a weakness but a courageous act of self-compassion.

Promoting Self-Compassion:

Self-compassion is a powerful antidote to shame. As a society, we can actively promote and normalize self-compassion practices among parents. Acknowledging that everyone makes mistakes, emphasizing the importance of self-care, and celebrating the efforts of parents — not just the outcomes — are crucial steps. When parents cultivate self-compassion, they are better equipped to navigate challenges without the heavy burden of shame.

Providing Accessible Resources:

Ensuring that parents have access to resources that address shame is vital. Whether it's books, articles, podcasts, or local support groups, having readily available tools empowers parents to proactively manage and overcome feelings of shame. These resources should emphasize the universality of the parenting experience and provide practical strategies for navigating the inevitable bumps along the way.

Emphasizing the Uniqueness of Each Parenting Journey:

Every parent's journey is unique, shaped by individual circumstances, cultural backgrounds, and personal values. Because of this, supporting parents navigating the depths of shame will look different for each parent as well. Emphasizing this diversity not only helps break down unrealistic standards but also encourages parents to embrace their unique paths. Celebrating differences and recognizing that there is no one-size-fits-all approach fosters an inclusive environment that uplifts parents rather than fueling shame.

Navigating the Maze of Parental Guilt:

In addition to shame, guilt is a common emotion that parents often grapple with. Guilt, distinct yet interconnected with shame, arises from actions or thoughts that parents believe have fallen short of their own or others' expectations. This emotion can manifest in various forms, such as feeling guilty for not spending enough time with children, for working too much, or even for the parenting choices made. It's crucial to address guilt in the parenting journey, as it can significantly impact a parent's mental health and the family dynamic. By acknowledging and discussing guilt openly, we can help parents understand that feeling guilty does not make them bad parents. Instead, it underscores their deep care and commitment to their children. Creating a supportive environment where parents can express and work through their feelings of guilt is essential for fostering a healthy, guilt-free approach to parenting. This includes sharing experiences, offering reassurance, and providing resources that help parents navigate and alleviate guilt. Ultimately, by tackling the twin challenges of shame and guilt, we can empower parents to embrace their parenting journey with more confidence, compassion, and self-forgiveness.

Listen here for more on parental guilt: https://drlaurabrayton.com/podcast/getting-emotionally-prepared-for-motherhood-with-cedric-bertelli-andrea-list/

Encouraging Professional Support:

Sometimes, the weight of shame can become overwhelming, and seeking professional support is a courageous step toward healing. As a society, we can contribute to destigmatizing therapy and counseling for parents. Encouraging open conversations about mental health and making these services accessible can be transformative for those grappling with shame.

Emotional Resolution with Cedric Bertelli 

Supporting parents in overcoming feelings of shame requires a collective and sustained effort. By fostering understanding, promoting vulnerability, and emphasizing self-compassion, we can create communities where parents feel seen, heard, and valued. Let's break the chains of shame together, cultivating an environment where the imperfect journey of parenthood is not only accepted but celebrated. In doing so, we empower parents to navigate the highs and lows with resilience, strength, and a profound sense of self-acceptance. After all, it takes a village, not just to raise a child, but to uplift and support the parents on their remarkable journey. Through empathy and compassion, we can collectively rewrite the narrative of parenting — one that embraces imperfections and cherishes the resilience it takes to navigate the beautiful complexities of raising the next generation.


If you or someone you know is struggling with feelings of shame as a parent, know that these feelings are normal and valid. Know that you are not in this alone, and professional support like Emotional Resolution with Cedric Bertelli is here to support you. Whether it be support for you, or looking for assistance in supporting a parent in your life, you can find a friend in Cedric to help. To learn more about Cedric Bertelli or to schedule a session, click HERE.

AI and Emotional Health

In the age of artificial intelligence (AI), the boundaries of what technology can achieve seem to be constantly expanding. AI has already proven its prowess in various fields, from diagnosing diseases to optimizing supply chains. However, when it comes to the realm of emotional health, a fundamental question arises: can AI completely replace humans as empathetic listeners? One of the key qualities that AI brings to the table is its ability to truly listen, devoid of biases and self-interest. In this blog, we will explore AI and Emotional Health: the potential for AI to fill the role of a listener in the context of emotional well-being.

The Human Listening Dilemma

Before delving into AI's potential as a listener, it's essential to understand the challenges that humans face when trying to be good listeners. Our inclination to think about what we want to say while someone else is speaking is a common human trait. We often approach conversations with preconceived notions, opinions, and a strong desire to express ourselves. This tendency can hinder the quality of our listening and our ability to provide unbiased emotional support.

The result? Many individuals feel unheard and unsupported when they most need it, exacerbating emotional distress. This is where AI's unique capabilities come into play.

The Power of AI in Listening

One of the main qualities that sets AI apart as a listener is its impartiality. AI doesn't possess personal biases, emotions, or the desire to assert its viewpoint. It can listen to your concerns without judgment or a hidden agenda, offering an objective and neutral space for individuals to share their thoughts and emotions. This characteristic can be especially valuable in the realm of emotional health.

1. Non-judgmental Listening: AI can provide a safe environment for people to express their emotions without fear of criticism or judgment. This is particularly important for individuals who might be hesitant to open up to a human due to social stigma or anxiety.

2. Unbiased Support: AI doesn't have personal biases, which means it can provide support and guidance without being influenced by personal beliefs or prejudices. This ensures that the advice and feedback offered are based on objective information and data.

3. 24/7 Availability: AI is available around the clock, making it an accessible source of support at any time of the day or night. This is crucial for individuals dealing with emotional crises when human listeners may not be available. 

Challenges and Limitations

While AI offers some unique advantages in the context of emotional health, it is essential to acknowledge its limitations. AI and emotional health can be a little tricky. AI lacks the capacity for genuine empathy and emotional understanding that a human can provide. It may not fully grasp the complexities of human emotions or offer the same depth of connection that human-to-human interactions can provide. AI is, after all, based on algorithms and data, which cannot truly replicate the richness of human emotional experiences.

Furthermore, privacy concerns, data security, and the potential for AI to be misused must also be considered. Building trust with AI as a listener will require addressing these challenges.

The Human-AI Partnership

In conclusion, while AI can serve as a valuable listener, it is unlikely to completely replace humans in the realm of emotional health. Instead, a more harmonious future may involve a partnership between AI and human listeners. AI can provide a non-judgmental, accessible, and consistent source of support, while humans can offer the depth of emotional understanding, empathy, and connection that only we can provide.

The key to leveraging AI effectively in emotional health lies in recognizing its strengths and limitations, and finding ways to integrate it into a broader support network. In this way, we can harness the power of technology to enhance emotional well-being while preserving the irreplaceable human touch.

Emotional Resolution with Cedric Bertelli 

In a world where AI truly listens, humans remain irreplaceable in their capacity to empathize and connect on a deeply emotional level. Thus, making the combination of both a powerful force for emotional health support. AI and emotional health may be a pair of our future, but if you struggle to feel heard and unsupported when you need it most, there is no shame in seeking professional help today. Schedule a session with Cedric Bertelli to resolve one or several emotional patterns. You can work to lift the impact of past trauma, resolve emotional difficulties (such as phobias, nervousness, stress, anxiety, panic attacks, depression, rage, jealousy, hypervigilance, anger, worry, rumination, inhibition, and others), and more. Ultimately, the goal of the sessions is to experience total and permanent resolution of a specific difficulty you’re facing. To learn more about Cedric Bertelli or to schedule a session, click HERE.

Is Self-Care Selfish?

What is Self-Care?

According to Google Trends, the number of searches for “self-care” has nearly quadrupled since 2018. If you think you’ve been hearing more about self-care lately, you’re right. Self-care involves taking intentional actions to prioritize and maintain your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. It means taking care of yourself so that you can be healthy, you can be well, you can do your job, you can help and care for others, and you can do all the things you need to and want to accomplish in a day. It includes activities and practices that help you relax, recharge, and reduce stress. Examples of self-care include yoga, getting yourself a present, journaling, doing a hobby that you love, spending time with people that you love, cooking your favorite meal, and more. Practicing self-care is important because it can improve your overall quality of life and help you better support and care for others.  

Why is Self-Care Important?

There’s often a misunderstanding that self-care is selfish or an egocentric practice. In reality, self-care is absolutely necessary in order for us to be well and have a positive impact on the environment around us. While it's important to strike a balance between caring for yourself and caring for others, neglecting self-care can lead to burnout and make it challenging to effectively care for others. Just like on an airplane, where you are instructed to put on your own oxygen mask before helping others, self-care is about ensuring you are in a good physical and mental state so that you can be there for others when needed. When it comes to your mental health, self-care can help you manage stress, lower your risk of illness, and increase your energy.

Can Self-Care Become Selfish?

Self-care is about recognizing when you need to take care of yourself and doing so without harming or neglecting others. Self-care and looking after your own mental health and well-being is not a luxury, it is a necessity.  Yes, you've read that taking care of yourself needs to be a priority. But you may have many people or things vying for your attention. As a result, focusing on yourself seems unnecessary — even selfish sometimes. You also may have been raised in a family in which denying oneself was respected and even encouraged. It’s time to let go of this thought process. Without self-care, you are not filling up your cup with the things that you need. When you begin to hope and expect others to care for you, that can be self-centered. However, caring for yourself is not.

Emotional Resolution with Cedric Bertelli

Self-care can take place in many forms including therapy and learning to conquer your emotions. If you’re ready to take the next step forward on your self-care journey, you can schedule a session with Cedric Bertelli HERE. These sessions aim to resolve one or several emotional patterns and lift the impact of past trauma, resolve emotional difficulties (such as phobias, nervousness, stress, anxiety, panic attacks, depression, rage, jealousy, hypervigilance, anger, worry, rumination, inhibition, and others). 

How to Act Instead of React

Acting instead of reacting involves being proactive and intentional in your responses to various situations. It's about taking control of your actions and decisions rather than letting external factors dictate how you feel and behave. EmRes is a method to help you get there. To learn more about them, keep reading. Acting instead of reacting has many benefits including but not limited to enhancing relationships, improving communication, better decision-making skills, reduced regret, and more.

Accept

One of the main goals of EmRes is to accept where you’re at and what you feel in order to adapt to your reality and to your emotional state. Accepting means that you practice allowing your feelings to be what they are without judging them or trying to change them. When you adapt to what is actually happening, then you’re able to act instead of react. For example when talking about anger, the first step to resolve this anger is to accept that you are angry and not blame it on anyone or anything. This means owning your anger and taking responsibility for your anger. Take back your power! When you act instead of react, you maintain a greater sense of control over your responses. You choose how to engage with situations and people, rather than being driven by impulsive emotions. You’ll always want to maintain control.

Adapt

Once you accept your anger, you can begin to form a resolution. You can adapt to your anger and take the time to figure out how your anger feels using the EmRes protocol. Once the anger begins to resolve, then you can adapt to what life actually is- not how it felt through the window of your trauma. You can work on letting go of any negative energy, resentment, or lingering discomfort. This is about accepting emotional baggage and integrating them instead of carrying them. While carrying past experiences (and the emotional baggage that comes with them), take a toll on our health. With the ability to adapt and accept, you won’t be wasting your energy away. Ultimately, the idea of EmRes is accepting fully and completely so that you can adapt and from there, and act with intention.

Manage Your Emotions

Emotions are natural, but it's important to know how to manage them effectively. You never want your emotions to control you. Deep breathing, sensory groudness, and mindfulness activities all can help you manage your emotions. In addition, Emotional Resolution (EmRes) helps you to work towards addressing and resolving emotional conflicts or issues. It involves acknowledging and finding a sense of closure or peace with your emotions. You can schedule a session with an EmRes practitioner to help you get there.


EmRes with Cedric Bertelli

Schedule a session with Cedric Bertelli to resolve one or several emotional patterns. You can work to lift the impact of past trauma, resolve emotional difficulties (such as phobias, nervousness, stress, anxiety, panic attacks, depression, rage, jealousy, hypervigilance, anger, worry, rumination, inhibition, and others), and more. Ultimately, the goal of the sessions is to experience total and permanent resolution of a specific difficulty you’re facing. To learn more about Cedric Bertelli or to schedule a session, click HERE,


4 Ways To Stop Being Haunted By Your Past

The past can sometimes cast a long shadow over our lives, haunting us with regrets, painful memories, and missed opportunities. Some of these shadows are obvious, and show up in our behaviors or our emotional states, others are operating in the dark, they are not experienced as "emotions", they are tensions, sensations that influence our thoughts, relationships with others, situations, self and life in general. Dwelling on the past can hinder personal growth and prevent us from fully embracing the present moment. If you find yourself burdened by the ghosts of your past, it is important to remember that you have the power to break free from their grip. In this article, we will explore four empowering strategies to help you release the haunting presence of your past and move forward with renewed strength and clarity. By embracing these techniques, you can embark on a transformative journey of healing and reclaim the joy and fulfillment that awaits you in the present.

Practice Self-compassion and Forgiveness

Recognize that everyone makes mistakes and has moments they regret. Instead of dwelling on past actions or decisions, practice self-compassion by being kind and understanding towards yourself. Understand that you are human and deserving of forgiveness, just like anyone else. Embrace the opportunity to learn and grow from those experiences, knowing that they do not define your worth or future trajectory.

Reframe Your Perspective

Rather than seeing your past as a haunting presence, try reframing it as a source of growth and learning. Reflect on the lessons you have gained from those experiences and how they have shaped you into the person you are today. Focus on the positive changes and progress you have made since then, celebrating your resilience and personal growth. Embrace the idea that your past can serve as a stepping stone towards a brighter future.

Embrace Self-EmRes, Mindfulness and Present Moment Awareness

Often, the haunting nature of the past arises from ruminating on past events and allowing them to dominate your thoughts. Practice mindfulness and present moment awareness to ground yourself in the here and now. Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment, consciously redirecting your attention away from intrusive thoughts about the past. By cultivating mindfulness, you can create a space for inner peace and reduce the influence of the past on your present well-being.


Learn to apply
EmRes on yourself to welcome the ghosts from your past with vulnerability and openness; Providing them with the opportunity to finally go back to where they belong.   

Seek Support Through Therapy or Counseling

If the haunting memories and emotions from your past continue to significantly impact your daily life, seeking professional help can be beneficial. Therapy or counseling can provide you with a safe space to explore and process your past experiences, develop coping mechanisms, gain perspective and guidance on moving forward, and build a support system to aid you on your journey of healing. Remember, reaching out for support is a sign of strength and a proactive step towards finding liberation from the weight of the past.

Remember that overcoming the haunting nature of the past is a process that takes time and effort. Be patient with yourself and celebrate the progress you make along the way. With self-compassion, a shift in perspective, mindfulness, and professional support if needed, you can gradually find freedom from being haunted by your past and embrace a more fulfilling present and future. If you are struggling with your past, check out Cedric Bertelli’s website. Schedule a session to resolve one or several emotional patterns from your past and to begin lifting the impact of past trauma and resolve emotional difficulties. 

Consequences of Avoiding Your Phobias

Consequences of Avoiding Your Phobias

Consequences of Avoiding Your Phobias: Avoidance of phobias can lead to heightened anxiety and fear. By avoiding the situations or objects that trigger your phobia, you may temporarily reduce anxiety in the short term.

How to Welcome Anxiety & Overcome It (for kids)

How to Welcome Anxiety & Overcome It (for kids)

How to Welcome Anxiety & Overcome It (for kids): When your child is anxious, it’s natural as a parent to want to help them feel better. However, when you try to protect kids from the things that upset them, you can accidentally make anxiety worse. The best way to help kids overcome anxiety is to teach children to welcome anxiety and resolve it. Teach them how to deal with it. 


Traumatic Events Steal Pieces of our Life

What are Traumatic Events Defined as?

 A traumatic event is an incident that can cause physical, emotional, or psychological harm. The CDC says that traumatic events are marked by the following:

  • A sense of horror

  • Helplessness

  • Serious injury

  • Threat of serious injury

  • Death / threat of death

Traumatic events can also affect more than just the survivors that were involved. Friends and relatives of the victim can also be affected as well as rescue workers at the event. Some examples of traumatic events include rape, war, witnessing a death, domestic abuse, a severe car accident, and more.

How do Traumatic Events Affect You on a Day-to-Day Basis?

Moving past the initial shock of a traumatic event can take 4-6 weeks. After that, responses may vary. Traumatic events can affect you daily. Some ways you might be affected on a day-to-day basis include:

  • Nightmares

  • Repeated Flashbacks

  • Intense fear of recurrence of the traumatic event

  • Isolation

  • Sudden mood changes

  • Denial

  • Anger

  • Irritability

  • Anxiety

Traumatic events can affect everyone daily, but these are some of the most common. Developing PTSD is also a condition that occurs after suffering from a traumatic event. Many of these symptoms can make it hard to live the life you want to live, but you don’t have to live like that.

This is not an Ideal Way to Live

Nobody wants to live with nightmares, flashbacks, and more on a daily basis. Luckily, there are ways to manage your traumatic stress. Having a consistent schedule and daily routine can help you manage stress, be productive, and find stability and consistency. Be sure to take care of your body and mind by eating well-balanced meals, exercising, getting enough sleep, etc. It also can help to communicate the experience you went through with your support system like family, friends, support groups, therapists, and more. Talking about it can help you process the trauma. 

EmRes can Help you Rediscover those Pieces

EmRes, or Emotional Resolution, connects you to the origin of a difficult emotion through your physical sensations and modulates the unwanted emotional response permanently. This simple yet rarely used physiologic capacity is innate to all human beings. It is an ability you are born with, but working with an EmRes Certified Practitioner, you'll be able to practice how to work through those emotions again. How does EmRes help with trauma? Our body keeps somatic traces of all our traumatic experiences. When exposed to a stimulus that reminds the body of a past danger, the viscero-somatic memory linked to this danger is reactivated, creating the base of a disruptive emotional response. EmRes allows the body to integrate traumatic information and to tune-in to our current reality instead of reacting through a past memory. It helps the body recognize that the perceived danger is nowadays obsolete. Overall, the goal of EmRes is to reintegrate and recover these pieces that traumatic events stole from our life.

Emotional Resolution with Cedric Bertelli

If you want to schedule your free consultation with Cedric Bertelli, founder of the Emotional Health Institute, you can do so HERE.

Feeling our way back to Peace.

shutterstock_65758843.jpg

Seeking appears to be central to the human condition.At our core, we aspire to be at peace with ourselves, with others, to attain contentment. Like a compass, this search for contentment drives our lives and our behaviors. It fuels religious fervor; the burgeoning self-help industry; workaholism; the legal and the illicit drug industries; it funds tens of thousands of yoga retreats annually and over 30,000 new users of meditation apps per day in the United States alone. As we move through our days yearning for contentment, we experience stress, anxiety, frustration, shame, physical discomfort. We accept these as an inevitable part of life. Maneuvering through these obstacles, we constantly look for inner peace; we look for it outside of ourselves, convinced that eventually—with perseverance and some good luck—we will find the practice, or the community, or the philosophy which will open the door to our contentment. Then, we will feel fearless, healthy, safe, and fulfilled.

As ancient texts and current self-improvement gurus tell us: we already possess what we are looking for. Imagine a state of contentment and inner peace as the default for each one of us. What if all our efforts are driven by a primal need to recover a lost default state of peace?

What keeps us away from this state? The goal-directed seeking, the cerebral effort of trying to “feel better” traps us in our own heads. We reanalyze the past and reconstruct or fear the future while ignoring the sensation of being in the present. Those of us more adept at being in the present have a tendency to be happier.

Why is this? As humans, we have a physiological capacity for resolving negative emotions. This innate capacity enables us to permanently integrate disruptive emotions through an active awareness of the physical sensations associated with each emotion. In other words, rather than trying to understand our pain or figure out how to avoid it, or how to control it, all we have to do in order to permanently resolve it, is to physically feel what constitutes our emotional pain. Our mind and body will do the rest. The answer to our emotional difficulties is literally within each emotion.

Through the hundreds of sessions that I have done with clients, I have witnessed how any emotional struggle, stress, isolation or disconnectedness can be permanently regulated by tapping into this physiologic capacity for emotional regulation. Our body is “wired” to integrate and resolve our stresses, we just have to let it do its work.

Not surprisingly, a stress-free mind begets a healthier body. After years of working with clients who struggle with emotional difficulties, we noticed that their chronic physical ailments, such as eczema, asthma, arthritis, tinnitus, among others, resolve or improve as they regulate their emotional distress. This finding suggested that if the body is not under chronic stress it is better empowered to fight or neutralize disease or inflammation. Based on this observation, we developed an efficient protocol for resolving physical ailments by specifically targeting the stressors which create or exacerbate the physical symptoms. Once the stressors are identified, we can resolve them by using the natural capacity for emotional regulation. We all have the opportunity to live a life free from pain; we can access it when we stop running away from our fears or trying to control them. Instead, we need to take the time to observe, recognize, and accept our behavioral patterns. Once we accept them, once we physically feel our fears, we become free of them, one by one. As a result, our body becomes healthier and stronger.

It is never too early or too late to start. Are you going to start?

Jessica’s Story of Overcoming Anger

A woman looking up and enjoying a peaceful sunset. Seeking help overcoming anger with your children.

Consciously or subconsciously, we humans are constantly impacted by the moods and emotions of others. In fact, we go so far as to push each other’s buttons just because there is “juice” there! Did you ever notice that when we are triggered, the people around us can sense it and their mood or demeanor shifts? Often they do not even realize why they feel this inner shift.  This phenomenon is common in adults and children alike. I very clearly remember working with a 35 year old single mother, Jessica.  Jessica contacted me last year seeking help with the intense anger she felt toward her 6-year-old daughter. Most of the time, the anger was triggered by little things, like her daughter not being able to choose between two pairs of shoes or taking too long to get dressed. It is common for parents to have occasional feelings of anger toward their children. Even when they intellectually understand that something is not worth getting upset about, they just CAN’T help it! The anger can be overwhelming.  And after they’ve blown up and the child is crying, they feel guilty and terrible about themselves. They resolve to be more patient. Still, the pattern plays itself out time and time again. It is hard on the child, the parent, the co-parent—the whole family.

In Jessica’s case, she would get extremely frustrated and angry when her daughter was slow to get ready, couldn’t make a decision, or left her toys lying around. The frustration was so intense at times that Jessica, a sweet and charming woman, had to walk away from her daughter to scream and punch something—a door, a pillow, anything.

I want to take a second here to recognize that it takes a lot of courage for a parent to acknowledge this kind of behavior and to seek help. Many would be too ashamed, afraid of being judged, to take the steps toward change.  But Jessica was committed to a close relationship with her daughter. She could see that her behavior was making the girl feel sad and afraid.

Jessica heard about my work with emotional regulation through a girlfriend who attended one of my monthly free trainings.  We met in my office in San Francisco for the session. As I usually do, I asked her how long she will need to notice whether her anger has resolved. I explained that once a negative emotion has been resolved, it will never return.  Jessica chuckled and said: “I will know tonight or tomorrow morning! But let’s wait a couple of weeks, just to be sure”. So we booked our follow up appointment in two weeks and, feeling confident that she had resolved her anger, I was eager for the follow-up.

When the day finally came, as I opened the door Jessica was standing there with a huge smile:
“I don’t know what you did, but it worked!” she said. I asked her to tell me about it, “Well …”, she continued, “I did not get upset once in the morning, not once! That has never happened before”.  I said that it was wonderful and congratulated her on the work she accomplished during our session.  “Wait, there is more to it!” she said. Since the session, her daughter was noticeably better about cleaning up after herself, getting ready in the morning, and choosing between her pink or white sneakers without anybody having to plead with or push or frighten her!

It made total sense: mom got rid of her button and, instead of feeling blocked or afraid, the child could make decisions peacefully, naturally, easily!

Jessica shared another effect of our session. The eczema she had on her neck for several months disappeared within a few days of our work together.
Sometimes this happens after a session—it is just the body saying “thank you!”

Let me wrap up by saying that the solution to our emotional problems is definitely inside of us. Often, the best way to change a difficult situation is to change our behavior. To do this reliably, we must heal our emotions. And all of us can do that, our body has the natural capacity for it. The greatest challenge is recognizing and acknowledging our patterns. Once we have identified them, regulating the dysfunctional emotions is straightforward. And the impact is powerful, on our life and on the lives of people around us.

If you’re interested in learning more about Tipi and discussing if it could help you or clients you work with, join us for one of our free monthly events, or schedule a free consultation with me here.